Top Design - Special Guest Commentary

Thanks, Mia...

New Top Design Segment - Where In The World Is Matt Lorenz?

Welcome to the first installment of what will hopefully become a recurring segment.

So, where in the world is Matt Lorenz?

THERE'S MATT!!

On the festive corner of Castro and Market.

Where will that silly devil turn up next? Tune in next week and find out!

Top Design Update - Tenant Found For Ryan's Room

Quotes from tenant (like room) were incoherent. Sources report cats appear to be "cautious, but optimistic".

Top Design: Kiss The Goil

Sadly, all the best moments end up on the cutting room floor...

Top Design: Sneak Preview

Kelly readies herself for fifth installment of Top Design. Bravo Stylist, Paris acquiesces to her demands and tailors the only look that could possibly top that of episode 4.

Wearstler approved, crediting Michael Adam's use of high collars as inspiration.

Slop Design

This week, she who's name we do not speak made a new BFF, flung poo at her female carpenter, and baffled millions as she produced another sherbert-flavored room to emerge victorious. She gets to Build-a-Bear and pick a carpenter for the next challenge.
Michael was dissed for using what the judges haughtily referred to as a banana and grape color scheme. Judges went so far as to describe it as (gasp!) Mac N' Cheese. Attempts by Michael to defend his palette proved unsuccessful. Michael was last seen plotting vengeance. A gathering of his minions from across the country briefly threatened to turn the PDC into the next Waco. National Guardsmen remain on stand-by.

Self-professed artist, wanna-be icon and sk8erboy Ryan produced a room that could only be described as where popsicle sticks go to die. Adding audio insult to visual injury, he then proceeded to insult the judges' sensitivities by badmouthing swatches and pretty rooms. In spite of said blasphemy and obscene finger gestures, Ryan remains. Repeat. Ryan remains.

Erik with a "k" suffered from yet another shortage of camera-time but takes the award for Best Dressed. Erik also takes the Laz Award for Best Trained Eyebrow.

Former Playmate Kelly served as a walking Public Service Announcement. Fearful women everywhere responded by shaving their heads.


Oh, yeah. Goil Riverdanced, Andrea was bland, Matt was robbed, Margaret remains fabulous, and Felicia was vanquished.

Separated at Birth?

Laz has no business checking Top Design-related blogs or Photoshopping after midnight. He gets a bit wacky. He starts looking at silly cat pictures. And he starts referring to himself in the third person.

As some of you know, Laz is partial to Michael Adam's antics. Michael's grown on Laz and makes him giggle. This week Michael played nicely with the other designers and didn't eat the crayons. He produced a perfectly fine room and managed to avoid using fugly afghans and the color combination of orange and green. Unlike she who's name we do not speak. Fine as Michael's room was, Laz believes it was Matt who was robbed of what should have been his first victory on the show. But that's another post...on another blog. This is about Michael. Who even after handling himself as a capable and professional designer somehow still managed to end up (if only briefly) in Laz's Photoshop cauldron.

Cat Geek. Michael Adams. Separated at birth? You decide...

Honey, no...

Ladies, don't. Just don't, ok? Kelly, love, I hate to say it but you look like a troll doll in deep humidity. Would it have killed you to consult one of the many queens you were undoubtedly surrounded by at Bravo? That said, God bless you for doing it! The visual trainwrecks you contribute to the show are indispensable!

I should mention for those who missed the preview of next week's Top Design, that this is what Kelly has opted to do with her hair for the episode airing this coming Wednesday (Feb 21st). Set your TiVOs!

Why Animals Eat Their Young

Defying Gravity - As Performed at the Tony Awards

Ok, this should give you a pretty darn good feel of what the scene is supposed to go like. At the reigns are the amazing Idina Menzel and Kristen Chenowith who originated the roles on Broadway. If you're a closeted musical theatre person who hadn't heard much about "Wicked", I strongly suggest getting a copy. If you're gay and into the showtunes, chances are you already love it and are planning future pet's names around the characters.

Defying Gravity

Ok, I need to preface this a bit so you know why I would subject you to Josh (aka Wickedboi). I have loved the musical "Wicked" since I first heard the soundtrack in 2004. Some music requires time to be fully appreciated as a piece of work but "Wicked" had me from the first listen. As with many of "Wicked's" gay fans I related to Elphaba, who by the end of the show becomes the Wicked Witch of the West. She is a talented and ambitious young lady who dreams of meeting the Wizard of Oz. The Wizard, she believes can "ungreen" her. and make her more socially acceptable. She does end up meeting the wizard but alas, the reality of the meeting fell short of her idylic fantasy. In fact, it goes very wrong and the wizard's PR director goes into damage control mode by attacking Elphaba's credability with the townspeople and even going so far as to declare her Wicked.

At the end of act 1, Elphaba is being hunted by the wizard's men. Glinda is with her trying to talk some sense into her. Elphaba is determined to defy gravity as a means of escape and urges Galinda to join her. She doesn't. The pivotal point of the scene is when Elphaba successfully executes her levitation spell and rises about the crowd chasing her. The gays just go crazy at this point. I mean, the misunderstood hero rises above those who now persecute her over lies and for being different and now thought to be wicked. I'm misty just typing this!

So anyway, that brings me to 21yr old Josh. I admire Josh. I admire the balls of steel that Josh has for posting himself on youtube singing both Elphaba's part as well as that of Glinda. The end is vocally challenging but God bless him, he goes for it. I don't think Josh will be the next Elphaba or Glinda but let's not forget what it took for Josh to share this with the world. It has certainly made me giggle. Well, I've rambled, it's late at night, heaven forbid I should actually live up to my own blog description. So all I'll say is...Go Josh!

It's Peanut Butter Jelly Time...

I'm evil and must be destroyed...